So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
