thus making me awesome and them whores
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
