ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize
