I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
