Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
