apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
