I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
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