I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize