His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
