Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Randomize
