he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
