More tranny stories later!
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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