Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
