just come out here and I will go home with you...
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
