it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize