You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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