Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
