the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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