I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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