There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
