Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
