I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize