I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Randomize
