At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
pray to the hookup gods
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
