DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
