is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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