Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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