i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I want her autograph on my taint
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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