How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Quick, to the slutcave!
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
