READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
