Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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