I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
