i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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