I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
