In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
