Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize