The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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