Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
