I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
