on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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