Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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