So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
