But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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