how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
