Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize