i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize