Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
this will be a night to untag.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
that may or may not have been my penis.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
