I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
