he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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