I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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