So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
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